Before stepping into a dating relationship, it’s important to recognize that successful relationships require intentionality and planning. As Christians, our relationships should reflect our faith and commitment to God’s will. To build a relationship that honors God and leads to a strong, healthy marriage, there are three key plans every man or woman should have in place: a plan for yourself, a plan for your life partner, and a plan for your relationship or marital journey.
Plan for Yourself
Before you can successfully enter into a relationship, it’s crucial to have a plan for yourself. This plan involves understanding who you are in Christ, what your purpose is, and how you’re growing spiritually and personally.
Your identity in Christ is the foundation upon which everything else is built. Ephesians 2:10 reminds us, "For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them." Knowing your worth and purpose in God’s eyes will give you the confidence and clarity needed to navigate relationships.
Take time to develop your character, faith, and emotional maturity. Are you grounded in the Word? Do you have a solid prayer life? Are you pursuing the calling God has placed on your life? These are important questions to answer before bringing someone else into your life. The more secure you are in your identity and purpose, the better prepared you’ll be to build a healthy relationship.
This plan should also include practical aspects such as your education, career goals, and financial stability. Proverbs 24:27 advises, "Prepare your outside work, make it fit for yourself in the field; and afterward build your house." In other words, get your life in order before trying to build a life with someone else.
Plan for Your Life Partner
The second essential plan is for your future life partner. While you may not know who that person is yet, it’s important to have a vision for the kind of person you want to marry. This isn’t about creating an unrealistic checklist, but rather about identifying the qualities that are important to you in a spouse.
As a Christian, your top priority should be finding someone who shares your faith and commitment to God. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says, "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?" Marrying someone who shares your faith will ensure that you’re aligned in your values, goals, and vision for life.
Think about the qualities that are important to you—integrity, kindness, a sense of responsibility, and a strong work ethic. Consider what kind of partner you need to complement your strengths and support you in your weaknesses. Pray for God to shape you into the kind of person who would attract the partner you’re seeking.
It’s also important to consider how you will serve and support your future spouse. Marriage is a partnership, and it requires a willingness to put the other person’s needs before your own. Ephesians 5:21-25 speaks about mutual submission and sacrificial love in marriage, a principle that should guide your plan for your future partner.
Plan for Your Relationship or Marital Journey
Finally, you need a plan for your relationship or marital journey. This plan involves setting goals and boundaries for how you’ll build your relationship from the beginning and how you’ll maintain a healthy marriage in the future.
Start by setting clear boundaries that will protect your relationship and honor God. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 advises, "For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God." These boundaries might include physical limits, but they also involve guarding your emotional and spiritual health.
Think about how you’ll handle communication, conflict resolution, and decision-making as a couple. Healthy communication is key to any relationship, and it’s something you should plan for from the start. Proverbs 15:1 teaches, "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." How you speak to each other will shape the atmosphere of your relationship.
As you consider the long-term, think about your vision for marriage. What kind of family do you want to build? How will you keep Christ at the center of your relationship? What steps will you take to grow together spiritually, emotionally, and physically? Having a clear plan for your marital journey will help you stay focused on what truly matters as you move forward.
Dear young believer, entering a dating relationship is a significant step, one that should be approached with prayerful consideration and intentional planning. By having a plan for yourself, a plan for your future life partner, and a plan for your relationship or marital journey, you’re setting the stage for a relationship that honors God and leads to a strong, fulfilling marriage.
Remember the words of Proverbs 16:3, "Commit your works to the Lord, and your thoughts will be established." As you plan and prepare, commit every step to God, trusting that He will guide you in His perfect timing and according to His perfect will.
May your relationships be a reflection of God’s love and grace, and may you always seek to honor Him in all that you do in Jesus Name.
Hope Expression celebrates you.
Prince Victor Matthew
Comments