Skip to main content

Marriage Will cost you

The truth is this: marriage will cost you.

When you think of the cost of marriage, what comes to mind?

According to recent statistics, the average couple today spends $26,444 on a wedding. That’s a lot of money, but it’s nothing compared to the REAL cost of marriage. Because like it or not, marriage will cost you MORE. It will cost you something great. It will cost you a price much larger than the money you spend on a ring or a wedding or a honeymoon: it will cost you yourself.

I heard a married man on TV say (regarding whether or not he was going to stay in his own marriage), “I shouldn’t be with someone if I’m not happy…” and it made my stomach turn. 

What an accurate reflection of the self-centered society we live in, everyone believing that their main goal in life is THEIR OWN personal happiness. What a small and shallow way to live.

If you’re getting married with that as your main goal, to make yourself happy, you will be disappointed in a severe way.

Marriage is not about your happiness, it’s not even about you. It’s about LOVE – which is something we choose to give time and time again. It’s about sacrifice, serving, giving, forgiving, and then doing it all over again.

No wonder we choose divorce over commitment…because most of the time, we’re choosing “personal happiness” over real commitment….over real love.

They say marriage teaches you more about selflessness than you ever wanted to know. I have definitely found that phrase to be true in my relationship with my husband. Because at the heart of it, real love is all about sacrifice. About the giving of yourself, in ways big and small. That’s what marriage will cost you.

It’s about offering forgiveness when you’ve been hurt.

It’s about giving your time though it’s not always convenient.

It’s about sharing your heart when you’d rather hold back.

It’s about cleaning the kitchen after a long weekend, even if it’s your least favorite job.

It’s about choosing to respond with love when you’d rather respond in anger.

It’s about offering a listening ear, when you’d rather tune out or go to bed. 

It’s about putting someone else’s needs and desires before your own.

It’s about giving up that last bite of cake, just so your spouse can enjoy it.

It’s about laying down your rights, to make way for the rights of another.

The list could go on and on, but it always ends with the same formula:

WE > ME

That’s what marriage will cost you. 

We live in a world that DESPISES the sacrificial side of marriage…and tries to wish it away. They teach to strive for power, control, and the upper hand in a relationship. They tell us to do what feels right, and not to tolerate anything less. They fool us to thinking that love is about doing what makes us happy.

And the second we feel less than happy, they encourage us to bail….to abandon ship…and to stop investing. 

But they’ve got it all wrong.

Because the more we give, the better we become.

Real love is not self-seeking…and it will ALWAYS cost you. More, and more, and more. It will cost your heart, your time, and your money. It will cost your comfort, your rights, and your pride. It will cost you to “lay down your life” for the life of another. And only those who learn to die to themselves are the ones who get to experience the resurrection power that comes with it.
Resurrection into real love, into real life, and into meaningful relationships.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Your Life, Relationships, and Resources Belong to God

Stewardship is more than managing money; it’s about recognizing that everything you are and everything you have belongs to God. Your life, time, relationships, and even your emotions are divine trusts, not personal possessions. Psalm 24:1 reminds us, “The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it.” When you understand this truth as a youth, it changes how you make choices, treat people, and handle opportunities. In dating and relationships, stewardship means honoring God with your heart and choices. You don’t date to fill loneliness; you date to reflect purpose. Your emotions should be guided by wisdom, not impulse. When you see your partner as someone God trusts you to treat with dignity, purity, and patience, your approach changes. You begin to love responsibly and communicate with respect, knowing you’ll give an account for how you handle another person’s heart. For singles, stewardship includes how you use your time and gifts while waiting. Every ...
Post a Comment
Read more

HOW TO UNDERSTAND SEXUAL VALUES

Sexual value in a relationship is the discipline and purity you uphold concerning your body and desires. What is sexual value? It is the standard you place on how you honor God with your sexuality. Why is this important? Because sex is not just a physical act; it is a spiritual covenant designed for marriage. Who should care about sexual values? Both singles and those dating, because disregarding God’s design in this area can leave scars, regrets, and unnecessary baggage. 1 Thessalonians 4:3 reminds us, “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality.” How do you build sexual value? By setting boundaries, avoiding compromising environments, and renewing your mind with God’s Word. When do you start? Now, not when you are engaged or married, because self-control is practiced long before the wedding day. Where does this apply? In how you relate with the opposite sex, the conversations you entertain, the media you consume, and the spaces you allow y...
Post a Comment
Read more

Why Openness About Money Is Key in Dating and Future Marriage

Beloved, money is one of the quiet tests of trust in every relationship. You cannot build a godly relationship on secrecy. Financial honesty is not just about showing your bank balance—it’s about being truthful with your lifestyle, habits, and priorities. The Bible says, “Provide things honest in the sight of all men.” (Romans 12:17). Openness builds trust, while financial silence breeds suspicion. When you are dating, honesty about money helps both of you plan wisely and avoid unrealistic expectations. Talk about how you earn, save, spend, and give. It’s not about impressing one another—it’s about understanding each other’s values. Hiding debts, exaggerating income, or pretending to live a certain way will only cause future pain. “Better is the poor who walks in his integrity than one who is perverse in his ways, though he be rich.” (Proverbs 28:6). Financial transparency also helps you discern compatibility. If one values stewardship while the other values status, there will be tensi...
Post a Comment
Read more